{"id":1888,"date":"2016-03-21T08:45:21","date_gmt":"2016-03-21T13:45:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/?p=1888"},"modified":"2016-03-21T09:16:37","modified_gmt":"2016-03-21T14:16:37","slug":"the-best-spam-comments-part-2-september-2015-february-2016","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/?p=1888","title":{"rendered":"The best spam comments, part 2 (September 2015-February 2016)"},"content":{"rendered":"

More fun times with spam! I couldn’t make this up if I tried, people. If you missed Part 1, check it out here<\/a>.<\/p>\n

He\u2019s obviously an extremely gifted runner. I\u2019m excited to see injury. A totalof 171 MMA matches involving 220 different fighters occurred during the study period. There necessary. It\u2019s not. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Sadist.<\/p>\n

However, there are a few men who simply choose to wear a straightforward tattoo on his or her neck. Hummingbird tattoos sneaking through low-cut jeans is both mysterious and tempting.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You can get any sort of ink that you want, I’m not judging. But, if someone asks you, “hey, where did you get the idea for your tattoo?” and you reply, “a spam comment,” it might be best to rethink your life choices.<\/p>\n

So ice creams, cookies, deep frozen meals is no way allow.<\/strong><\/p>\n

WHAT KIND OF LIFE IS THIS PERSON ADVOCATING<\/p>\n

Howdy! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this site? I\u2019m getting tired of WordPress because I\u2019ve had problems with hackers and I\u2019m looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be awesome\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

(I use WordPress)<\/p>\n

Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my apple ipad and tested to see if it can survive a 40 foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now broken and she has 83 views.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Your cousin is an evil genius.<\/p>\n

Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam feedback? If so how do you reduce it, any plugin or anything you can recommend? I get so much lately it\u2019s driving me mad so any assistance i\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

oh the irony…<\/p>\n

Did I not always see some hard fiber in her nature? Did I not, even at the time when I was proud to obey her behest, feel that it was surely a poor love which could drive a lover to his death or the danger of it? Did I not, in my truest thoughts, always recurring and always dismissed, see past the beauty of the face, and, peering into the soul, discern the twin shadows of selfishness and of fickleness glooming at the back of it? Did she love the heroic and the spectacular for its own noble sake, or was it for the glory which might, without effort or sacrifice, be reflected upon herself? Or are these thoughts the vain wisdom which comes after the event? <\/strong><\/p>\n

I ran this through \u201cI Write Like,<\/a>\u201d and it appears Arthur Conan Doyle is a blog reader!<\/p>\n

Today, I went to the beach front with my children. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said \u201cYou can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.\u201d She placed the shell to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside a\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

Imagine how the hermit crab felt!<\/p>\n

Do NOT under any circumstances have bra straps showing unless you want to make it in to the white trash wedding category.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Okay, Snobby McJudgerson. Your invitation is getting lost in the mail.<\/p>\n

Could it be just me or does it look as if like a few of the remarks appear like written by brain dead individuals? <\/strong><\/p>\n

I just can’t keep a straight face sometimes while reading these.<\/p>\n

Thanks for helping out, great information. \u201cConsidering how dangerous everything is, nothing is really very frightening.\u201d by Gertrude Stein.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Oooh, philosophy in my spam? I’ll take a second helping, please!<\/p>\n

Only a smiling visitant here to share the love (:, btw outstanding style and design .<\/strong><\/p>\n

This is rather sweet. Thanks! Who knew spam could be so positive?<\/p>\n

(And yes, this was definitely spam, unless you think hotsexxxyladeez4u@mypants.com is a real email address.)<\/p>\n

I loved as much as you will receive carried out right here.<\/strong>
\n The sketch is attractive, your authored subject matter stylish.<\/strong>
\n nonetheless, you command get bought an impatience over that you wish be delivering the following.<\/strong>
\n unwell unquestionably come more formerly again as exactly the same<\/strong>
\n nearly very often inside case you shield this increase.<\/strong><\/p>\n

If I put both hands flat on my temples and squish my head as hard as I can, I can ALMOST make my brain make sense of this word salad.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne doesn\u2019t discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.\u201d by Andre Gide.<\/strong><\/p>\n

More of this kind of spam, please!!! I actually had not heard this quote before and I rather like it.<\/p>\n

What i don\u2019t realize is in reality how you\u2019re not really much more smartly-liked than you might be now. You\u2019re very intelligent. You know thus considerably with regards to this topic, made me personally consider it from numerous numerous angles. Its like men and women aren\u2019t involved until it is one thing to accomplish with Girl gaga! Your own stuffs excellent. Always deal with it up!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Girl gaga? Is that like Lady Gaga as an adolescent?<\/p>\n

\u201cThe basis of optimism is sheer terror.\u201d by Oscar Wilde.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I FREAKING LOVE OSCAR WILDE!!!!<\/p>\n

I do believe all the ideas you\u2019ve introduced on your post.<\/strong>
\n They are very convincing and will certainly work.<\/strong>
\n Still, the posts are too brief for starters. May just you<\/strong>
\n please extend them a bit from next time? Thanks for the post.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You know how I can tell you haven’t actually read my writing? You think my posts are “too brief.” Haha!<\/p>\n

You can simultaneously North and South Carolina.<\/strong><\/p>\n

WHAT?<\/p>\n

You wish to increase your followers and community, spamming people is not the method <\/strong>it, end of story. <\/strong><\/p>\n

I love how self-aware these spammers are….<\/p>\n

I always spent my half an hour to read this web site\u2019s articles or reviews all the time along with a mug of coffee.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Perfect!<\/p>\n

Listed here are some easy suggestions that can assist you in your solution to running a <\/strong>blog mastery:<\/strong><\/p>\n

(nothing listed underneath)<\/p>\n

I\u2019m gonna watch out for brussels.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Out, damned sprout! Out, I say!<\/p>\n

the pepperoni will move inside the crust of the pizza.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Sounds like the sort of phrase used in covert ops. Sorry I intercepted the message.<\/p>\n

In order to write the proper grammetical reply it is advisable to wear the jersey from game<\/strong><\/p>\n

I’m picturing two writers duking it out in football jerseys. Vonnegut vs. Heller. Austen vs. Bronte. Fitzgerald v. Hemingway. Let’s get ready to rummmmmmble!!!<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re still on the fence: grab your favorite earphones, head down to a Best Buy and ask to plug them into a Zune then an iPod and see which one sounds better to you, and which interface makes you smile more. Then you\u2019ll know which is right for you.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I don’t know which I find funnier: the memory of a time when Zune vs. iPod was actually a thing, or the idea of actually getting assistance from an employee at a Best Buy.<\/p>\n

Part 3 will post in another 6 months!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

More fun times with spam! I couldn’t make this up if I tried, people. If you missed Part 1, check it out here. He\u2019s obviously an extremely gifted runner. I\u2019m excited to see injury. A totalof 171 MMA matches involving 220 different fighters occurred during the study period. There necessary. It\u2019s not.  Sadist. However, there […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1895,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"You'll laugh! You'll cry! I'm definitely enjoying this sequel even more than the original.","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_options":[]},"categories":[238],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"acf":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/Monty_Python__Spam_2440432n.jpg","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2321,"url":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/?p=2321","url_meta":{"origin":1888,"position":0},"title":"The best spam comments, Part 3 (March-August 2016)","date":"September 30, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"It's that time again! I always worry a bit that I'm going to stop getting interesting spam messages, but thankfully over these last 6 months, the spammers didn't disappoint. As always, these posts are lifted straight from my spam inbox - I have not edited out any of the spelling\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Off topic"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeecantata.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/460x345-spam-hello-kitty-musubi.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1195,"url":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/?p=1195","url_meta":{"origin":1888,"position":1},"title":"The best spam comments (March-September 2015)","date":"September 28, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Coffee Cantata is my first real website, and one thing I have learned is that websites and spam go hand-in-hand. Some of the spam is pretty hilarious, too! Most of it consists of links to questionable prescription drugs and SEO marketing, but every now and then I get a comment\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Off topic"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeecantata.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/Spam-Can-e1440770071410.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5QIia-us","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1888"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1926,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1888\/revisions\/1926"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1895"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1888"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1888"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coffeecantata.co\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1888"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}